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Back to School Anxiety: A Parent's Guide

As the summer holidays come to an end and the new school year looms, many parents find their children grappling with high levels of anxiety. Whether your child is starting school for the first time, transitioning to a new school or academic year, the return to the academic routine can stir up worries. Children often mirror their parents’ emotions, so your ability to stay calm and positive can significantly influence how they handle their own school-related anxieties. This blog article outlines top tips in managing a smooth transition back to school.


back to school anxiety

Understand School Based Anxiety

School anxiety is a common experience that affects students of all ages. It can manifest as physical symptoms like headaches or stomachaches, emotional symptoms such as irritability or sadness, and behavioural changes like avoidance or withdrawal. Recognising these signs is the first step toward managing anxiety effectively.


The next question is to ask yourself, if there is anything in particular contributing to your child's anxiety? Have they expressed friendship issues over summer, or bullying from the year before? Perhaps they are feeling out of the loop with their friendship group. For some young people, there are additional underlying factors that contribute to school based anxiety, such as undiagnosed specific learning difficulties (like dyslexia) or social communication difficulties (such as autism spectrum condition). If you have concerns about aspects of your child's learning, you can contact us at The Lotus Psychology Practice to discuss whether an assessment is indicated.


Practical Tips for Managing School Based Anxiety

  1. Establish a Routine Early: One of the best ways to ease the transition back to school is to start adjusting your routine a week or two before school starts. Gradually shift your sleep schedule to match the school day, and set regular times for meals, study, and relaxation. A consistent routine can provide a sense of stability and reduce the uncertainty that often fuels anxiety.

  2. Prepare in Advance: Being prepared can significantly reduce anxiety. For students, this might mean organising school stationary, reviewing class schedules, or even visiting the school beforehand if possible. The more prepared you feel, the more confident you’ll be on the first day.

  3. Play Dates: If your child has been enjoying their summer holidays visiting family or spending time with friend who live close by, they may feel out of the loop with their school friends, which may be contributing to their anxiety. You may suggest that they arrange a play date, or a sleepover with a school friend in the lead up to the return to school.

  4. Practice Mindfulness and Relaxation Techniques: Mindfulness practices such as deep breathing, meditation, or progressive muscle relaxation can help calm anxious thoughts. Encourage your child to take a few minutes each day to practice these techniques, particularly when they feel overwhelmed. Apps like Headspace or Calm can offer guided practices to help students relax and refocus. You can find more anxiety management strategies in our previous blog article.

  5. Set Realistic Expectations: It’s important to set realistic expectations for the school year. Understand that it may take time to adjust to new routines, teachers, or classmates. Rather than focusing on perfection, encourage a mindset where challenges are viewed as opportunities for learning and development.

  6. Encourage Open Communication: Talking about anxiety can be incredibly helpful. Young people should feel comfortable expressing their concerns to parents, teachers, or friends. Parents can model this behaviour by sharing their own feelings about returning to work or facing new challenges. Open communication fosters a supportive environment where anxiety can be managed together.

  7. Validate Their Feelings: Let your child know that it’s okay to feel anxious or nervous about returning to school. Validate their feelings by listening and showing empathy, and then help them find ways to cope. It can be easy to respond with 'but you've had a brilliant summer!' However, your child's anxiety does not mean that they haven't enjoyed their summer holiday.

  8. Focus on Positive Aspects: While it’s easy to dwell on what might go wrong, try to focus on the positive aspects of returning to school. Reuniting with friends, participating in favorite activities, and learning new things are all exciting opportunities. By shifting the focus to these positive aspects, anxiety can be reduced.

  9. Encourage Independence: Gradually encourage your child to take on more responsibilities, such as packing their own backpack or organising their homework space. Building independence can boost their confidence and reduce anxiety.

  10. Role-Play Social Scenarios: If your child is anxious about social interactions, role-playing different scenarios can help them feel more prepared. Practice greetings, conversations, or dealing with common school situations. More top tips to manage social anxiety can be found here.

  11. Seek Professional Support if Needed: If anxiety becomes overwhelming or starts to interfere with daily life, it may be helpful to seek professional support. School counselors and/or therapists can provide resources or advice. If you feel your child may require specialist support in managing anxiety or difficulties at school you can contact us at The Lotus Psychology Practice to arrange an appointment.


Returning to school doesn’t have to be a source of overwhelming anxiety. With preparation, open communication, and a focus on positive aspects, both students and parents can manage the challenges of the new school year effectively. Remember that it’s okay to seek help if needed and that with time, the anxiety will likely diminish as everyone settles into the new routine. By embracing these strategies, you can make the transition back to school a smoother, more positive experience for everyone involved.

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